Extra! Extra! Read all about it...and BARF!

In a Tight Squeeze,

Bronx NAMBLA Chapter

Picks Vaupel Hemingway as president;

D. Moany Slides in Right Behind

The National Man-Boy Love Association crammed in the 37-5 vote last night confirming Vaupel Hemingway as the Bronx chapter's newest president.

"I can't believe something that my mother used to call just another sick habit led to such a great success," Hemingway said with a tear in his eye and a boy at his side. "They just can't pack in any better news!"

Hemingway and "friend" Ben Dover want to bring man-boy love out of the play room and into the mainstream. Hemingway's plan to give the group a new image include s developing more games to recruit young boys.

"We're way past 'find the quarter' and 'have you seen my puppy?' We're going to involve the children in poor blog writing and 'sightseeing' tours of 'the Big Apple.' We want to give them a real mouthful of everything that's out there."

D. Moany was not as enthused about tonight's outcome confirming Hemingway as NAMBLA's chapter president.

"I am going to take an enormously hard and long look at what happened tonight. I'm going to pound out a million times until I get there...um, to a solution."